It's Not Going Well, Part 2

So, after yesterday's post about my non-novel, today dawned bringing rain and a low-grade migraine. It's impossible to be inspired with a migraine --for me, anyway --so I settled in to do a little knitting.

Only, um, it appears that my novel isn't the only thing that's not going so well.

You know how I'm knitting a sweater (my first!) for my older daughter, Ana? I have the front and back finished and now I am working on the sleeves.

I have been working on them for at least, what? Twenty years now? Thirty? And this is all I have to show for my efforts.

Granted, I had to rip out the one sleeve I'd (mostly) done because I was doing the increases wrong. Then, Miraculous Laurie, aided and abetted by my knitting group, convinced me that I should really knit both sleeves at the same time because that way, even if they aren't exactly correct, they'll be exactly the SAME. This, apparently, is pretty important when knitting for a symmetrical person --and Ana is nothing if not symmetrical. Only, um, after knitting on these sleeves for most of my freaking LIFE, I just counted and I have a different number of stitches on them. Naturally, I threw them into my knitting bag in disgust. They better get their act together while they're in there or Ana is going to get one funky looking vest.

Meanwhile, I needed a small, cute project to give me a sense of satisfaction and get me out of my sulk. Luckily for me, my friend hokgardner gave birth to a tiny little girl and you know how baby knits are so easy and quick? I thought I'd so these adorable Elfin Slippers that I found on my friend Kim's blog.

The pattern turned out to be a lot trickier than I thought it would be. And my first slipper turned out so hideous that it looks like something used in Japan to start babies on the foot-binding path of torture.

So, then I thought, well, I'll just knit a little baby blanket. I scored some gorgeous machine-washable Noro yarn at my yarn store's Election Day Sale (love my LYS, love it) and the woman helping me gave me a really simple pattern to knit.

Except that IT looks like something one of the cats yakked up. Seriously, I've seen better looking FUR BALLS.

I don't know. Maybe I should just give up and buy the baby something. Because she could be in COLLEGE by the time I get something knitted to anyone's satisfacation.

Espcially if I have to start those sleeves over again.

Look at Edward, next to me here on the couch. Doesn't he look like he's totally stressed by my lack of production?

Comments

Ei said…
Barb, I've been really lousy at commenting lately (and there really is a reason, sort of, kind of) and usually one of your knitting blogs is, well, not as much my thing as yours. But you gave me a picture of Edward's belly. So I love you.

Good luck with those sleeves.
ccr in MA said…
I believe Edward is doing one of the famous cat-propitiates-the-knitting-fates-for-you stretches. Hopefully it will help un-screw your knitting mojo soon.

Or maybe he's just sleeping. Cute either way!
hokgardner said…
OK, I laughed out loud at the elfin bootie - loud enough to startle the baby, who is sleeping next to me on the sofa in a position similar to Edward's.
Ream O Rama said…
If it's any consolation I have a baby blanket I have been cross stitching for my college roommate's first born. He turned 16 in April. It has been so freaking long at this point I can't even give it to another friend because some are having GRANDCHILDREN.
I'd be happy to make a burnt offering to the knitting gods for you...hmm, blanket? What blanket?
Miriam said…
Oh, your cat SO UPSTAGED you. He's just delicious.
absolutelytrue said…
I'm pretty amazed by what you've managed to knit. Certainly looks better than anything I could come up with.

As for the slipper and hairball that you're not happy with... umm... since they are wool, you could... and I'm just throwing this out there... compost them.
MadMad said…
Ah, the joys of knitting... It's a wonder we do it anyway, isn't it? But you did pick some nice colors. That's gotta count for something.
DK said…
I think you're being too hard on yourself. You should try Edward's approach (love that belly!).
kim said…
I hope your headache is better. Things always seem more manageable when you take a step away from them. Just take a deep breath. The booties are very cute, despite your naysaying.... If it makes you feel any better, mine came out too small, and I really had to "mold" them to get a good picture. It's all illusion.
Becca said…
AAAH an Edward sighting! And an Edward belly to boot!!! Only toes could be better

I love the elfin booties. I bet they would look cute on her even if they look weird now.
Mokihana said…
Yay! Edward!

It probably isn't much consolation, but when I knit my first sweater for hubby, I had to frog the sleeve 7 times because the decreases were all junk. I even took the sweater and the pattern into several LYSs because I felt so stupid at not having them come out right.

It was the pattern, not me. But I'd still had to frog it.
RockStories said…
My sister was knitting a blanket for Tori while I was in labor.

I think she still has the squares. I thought she might finish it up and give it to my grandson when he was born, but she didn't get it done in time for that, either...
absolutelytrue said…
I think I started knitting something in 1986... not sure when the estimated completion date actually is. Perhaps if I ever get to retire and still have eyesight, maybe then I will revisit the idea of "finishing up" the project, whatever it was. Can't remember now if it was a blanket or baby bootie or something else.
CK Holder said…
Maybe you should try knitting a furball and see what it looks like instead. You make knitting sound like so much fun.

It occurred to me that I have spent much of my life looking for ways to keep my hands occupied. I stare at them now, wondering if I'll ever be able to knit.
Ok, this post cracked me up. I have some of these life-long projects myself. I also have one of those mild migranes this evening. Thanks for a laugh and smile.