I feel like maybe I should have some sort of flashing red sign right now that says that.
This morning, as I was going through Jane's backpack before school, I found this:
I've been on a slow burn ever since.
Today is the tenth day of school.
On the fourth day of school, Jane's teacher made her re-do work she'd already completed, saying there was no way she could have done it thoroughly enough. When Jane got home from school, she complained of a headache and a stomach ache.
On the fifth day of school, Jane came home early with a stomach ache and headache. I took her to the doctor who found nothing.
On the sixth day of school, Jane stayed home sick.
On the seventh day of school, my husband and I met with her teacher (I wore make-up and my pearls!) and spent an hour talking about how
A) our child responds better to positive reinforcement and will gladly walk through fire for you if she thinks you love her and she loves you back. We talked about how our last year's teacher was wonderful at showing this and how well Jane performed for her. We showed her a stack of Jane's stories and drawings. We hoped that she would get a glimpse of the positive force that is Jane Cooper --because honestly, a positive Jane Cooper is a lot easier to have around that a negative one.
B) she does process very quickly so you can trust her when she says she's completed her work
C) to please stop yelling at her (we're from the South, there is a very different method of communication up here and we think people are yelling at us who are merely having a normal conversation so when people REALLY yell, it tends to make
D) we take education and educators very seriously and would like for this to be a very positive relationship.
And then on day Nine, the teacher wrote this:
Is it really so hard to be civil and respectful when communicating with a nine-year-old?
I understand the need for full headings in school, despite the fact that Jane is the only Jane in her class. I understand the need for adherence to structure.
What I do not understand is how this teacher, who is pressed for time with 26 kids in her class, would choose to write a belittling and sarcastic note on a child's paper when a simple, "last name?" would have sufficed. I just don't understand how any educator could think that yelling and sarcasm will lead to a classroom full of happy, eager-to-learn children. What is really the goal here? To have them blindly follow rules without question or deviation, or to create an environment where kids can learn?
We have been blessed with many good, caring, respectful, motivated and inspired teachers over the course of our public school journey. These are people I honestly felt were working in concert with me to educate and love my kids --who saw their bright little faces and wanted them to have every possible resource to learn and succeed. Maybe if I hadn't had them for my kids, I wouldn't be so appalled and frustrated now. I've seen great, inspired teaching and I have seen the opposite.
We're working on a different solution for Jane. I just hope she isn't bullied to the point of having her spirit broken first.
Say it with me now: "ANGER."