Elmer Has My BACK, Y'all

I've told you about Elmer before, right?  He's the amazing and wonderful handyman who works on the property doing odd jobs like painting and trimming and weeding and...magic every once in a while.  I wrote about him here and here.  Go ahead and read about him.  I'll wait.

(While we're waiting, I'll tell you an exciting bit of yoga news: today I did a backbend from a standing position!  I KNOW! My instructor had to help me come back up from it, but I didn't even need traction afterward or anything!)

So, anyway, Elmer. I should mention that Elmer's first language is not English, and I have a pronounced Southern accent, so communication between the two of us isn't always easy. Elmer is here today doing some painting and before I left for yoga, I went out to talk to him about what he was planning for today because I needed help on a project. I managed to kill this enormous cactus that belonged to my landlords and it needed to be removed from the pot and disposed of, but it is LETHAL in it's stickeriness, so I needed help. (Yes, I made that word up. WHAT?)

I said, "I killed a cactus and I need some help getting rid of it, if you have some time today. Maybe we could just throw it in the compost or something?"

And Elmer's eyes got soft and concerned and comforting and he said, "Probably the best thing is if we dig a hole and bury him."

I said, "You think so?  Yes, you're probably right.  I don't want the pets stepping on it or anything."

Elmer nodded sagely, still looking concerned.  "I can take care of that for you. Did you have him long?"

And then it dawned on me: Elmer thought I was talking about a CAT.  He thought I'd killed one of our CATS!

I rushed to assure him that it was a big plant and that, honest, if it was a cat, I would be heartbroken and I would not ask him to just chuck that sucker into the compost.

It's good to know that if I have a corpse that needs disposal, Elmer has my back.

RIP, Cactus.