Sign of the Impending Apocalypse
Tonight, I was debating my children with regards to Haribo gummy bears.
Now, most of you know that I eat no other kind of gummy bears. And in my lifetime, I have eaten, roughly, 12 bazillion gazillion pounds of them. When I was single, I thought a nice dinner was some chardonnay and some Haribo gummy bears. (Hey, I ate the green ones--what do you want?) They are the ultimate comfort food for me --no doubt because my grandfather used to keep an old (and probably the same old) bag of them for when the grandchildren visited. In fact, I LIKE gummy bears (Haribo) when they are a little tough and stale.
Tonight, I was arguing that I am a connoisseur of them and there is NO DIFFERENCE in the various colors--they have no distinct flavors. So, we did some taste tests, including my mother, who hates them but assured me that I was really and truly WRONG about the flavors not having any relationship to the colors.
So I went on-line to prove how ridiculous and misguided those silly, silly family members are. And I found THIS: Number one of the FAQ at Haribo is this:
What are the flavors of the Haribo Gold-Bears?The white Gold-Bear is Pineapple; the green Gold-Bear is Strawberry; the yellow Gold-Bear is Lemon; the orange Gold-Bear is Orange; and the red Gold-Bear is Raspberry.
Apparently, the bears were reformulated in March of 2006.
WHAT??? WHAT???
This is just... Un-Freaking-Acceptable!
People! Clearly the world is ending. Run and take your Haribo Gold Bears (without the flavoring) with you.
Plus, WTF??? Green equals STRAWBERRY? Those people are SMOKING SOMETHING.
Comments
This is clearly not a good sign. I agree completely. I'm going out for disaster supplies now....including a stockpile of gummi bears.....
Another possible sign of impending doom - my verification word: tmkatzpl. Dude...
Anyway, I probably ate more packets of Gummy bears than I sold, and I can say with all confidence - they have always had flavors. I used to pick through and eat all the red ones first. The pineapple-flavored ones were last because they were my least favorite.
Now, have you ever been able to completely dissolve a Star Burst in your mouth? I haven't.
:)
I feel like the foundation of all that I've known has just crumbled into dust. I might have to give back my "Wine Snob" nickname since clearly, I don't deserve it.