Mid-Life Crisis, Number 63 --Reprise

Okay, okay, so I woke up thinking about my last post. I mean, I woke up about seven times last night and finally had to come downstairs, boot up the computer and admit that I was equivocating. I have some young adults who read my blog and I was trying hard not to hurt anyone's feelings.

This does not make for good, nor clear, writing.

The truth is that having my cousin and my niece here and spending time with them made me feel OLD. Staid. Frumpy. Invisible.

And really impatient, actually.

I DIDN'T think it was all adorable that at any given moment I was being treated to an extended discourse by the Cute Young Thangs about:

familial relationships
male/female dynamics
popular culture
computer technology
work ethic (!)
why the Beatles don't matter (!!)
the Tour de France

Mostly, I just wanted to say, "Oh, for God's sake, talk to me in ten years and not until then. Love ya, Baby, you're a star. Now just SHUT UP.

This makes me feel like a bad person. Wasn't I once more indulgent of Young Kids Today?

The truth is that I was already in a terrible mood. There are bad moods and then there are EPIC bad moods and I was in one of the latter. My children and I had been cooped up for, oh, at least three years in this damn house due to the rain. They have taken sibling bickering and parental disregard and WHINING to new levels of obnoxiousness. I've felt so angry with them, and so unhappy with the indictment this makes evident of my parenting, that I haven't been sleeping well. I have this monster sore inside my mouth, I'm still in the dang walking cast and unable to exercise, and our housekeeper had to come the day BEFORE our company left, which meant that six minutes after she left, the house needed to be cleaned again, not to mention all the bed linens changed, etc. And she had to clean all around all of us because we were, naturally, all stuck inside due to rain and then MORE RAIN. My cousin kept saying, "I come all the way from Germany, expecting nice weather and it rains every day." I kept apologizing, because clearly this was some shortfall of MINE. Everyone seemed to want or need something from me at every dang moment of the day. I am coming down with a lovely summer cold. Plus, and this is probably the most upsetting thing, my old dog (the one I've had since before I had my husband or my family) is beginning to have some serious health issues, including a staph infection that seems to be resisting treatment and I. Am. Not. Ready. To think about losing her. I'm just not.

I don't know. I seem to have a permanent case of PMS. Oh, look, it's raining again. That ought to help. Also, I'm starting my diet today. That ought to send me right over the edge into Happy Land.

And you know, the other thing about being with People Around Whom the World Revolves is that it made me remember my own protracted stay in that phase of life. Gosh, I was INSUFFERABLE. I'd like to thank my parents for keeping their senses of humor and not killing me.

And I'd like for them to tell me how they managed to do it.


Damsel said…
Oh, Barb... I'm sorry. I've had days like that, too, and they all pile up in a row sometimes.

You can come visit me today. We'll have coffee together, and you can help me with my novice knitting. :)
Suna Kendall said…
I read both of your posts this morning, and had a real chuckle, having spent yesterday listening to two teen boys (nice, smart ones, but still...). They sure did tell us a thing or two about music and the world.

My son went to debate camp for three weeks this summer and came back telling ME how postmodern philosophy worked, what I should think about politics, and how brilliant his teachers all were. Meanwhile he was spouting off my exact views and beliefs as if I'd never heard them before, never went to grad school, never studied those same topics. I just smiled, figuring if I didn't say anything, maybe he'd stick with my beliefs and not change his mind just to rebel.

Also, try riding on the bus with the high school band on the way to football games. You will learn SO much. Ha ha ha. You have a lot to look forward to.
hokgardner said…
Boy oh boy do I know how you feel. I was in a permanent bad mood last week. My husband forced me to go to the beach, and I do mean forced, and now I feel better. At least I did until I went three rounds with the 6-year-old about why she had to dust and why I didn't care that she didn't like chores. "I don't like cooking for you and your sister. Maybe I should just stop. How would you like that???" She wisely ran for cover.
Anonymous said…
Hokgardner - There must have been something in the stars yesterday. I almost didn't cook the roast and potatoes and gravy and veggies that everyone was looking forward to. Kind of like being on strike....I'm just so tired of working 5 days and then, on my weekend, picking up after and entertaining 2 kids! ARGH! I'll admit, my 9 year old still needs me to take her places and help arrange play dates etc. but the 16 year old??? Get the hell out of the house!! Know what he came up with when I said find something to do that doesn't involve a screen? He sat on the floor, half laying on his bed, staring at the wall. I'm at a loss - truly.